Well I recieved many and varied responses to my post “So your friend / family member has got their kidney transplant!“, unfortunately, at this stage, only one person has had the stones to comment in the blog.

As a result of this, I would like to issue a challenge to all family members and friends of people who are undertaking dialysis who come across this post.

You will need dedication and self control, but I hope that it will give you a glimpse into the life of a dialysis patient.

You will need:

• a two litre bottle
• Two sewing needles
• A cigarette lighter
• A roll of packing tape or masking tape
• Two lots of four hours free 48 hours apart
• Some disinfectant - dettol or the like
• Two bandaids

Firstly, fill the two litre bottle with water - this will be the sum intake of fluid for you for the next 48 hours.

Next, find a comfortable chair - you’re going to be sitting in it for the next four hours. Then take the disinfectant and and apply liberally to your arm. Now take the sewing needle, and hold it under the flame of the cigarette lighter for 30 seconds (you might want to hold the needle with a cloth or something to stop you burning your fingers) to sterilize it. Then, sitting in your comfortable, chair, insert the needle (once cooled) into your arm, and leave it there. Do the same with the other needle into a different spot on your arm Using the packing or masking tape, fix your arm to the arm of the chair. (You won’t be able to move your arm for four hours) . Now take the needles out of your arm and put a bandaid on the holes.

Now sit for four hours, you can read, watch TV, use a laptop computer, whatever you can do without leaving the chair and only using one arm. (Keep in mind that a real dialysis patient also has to deal with the physiological effects of dialysis, but there’s no real way to safely replicate that here, so we’ll leave that one alone).

Family members may bring you drinks and food during this time, but remember, any drinks you have must be deducted from your two litre bottle. For example, if you have a 300ml coffee, you must pour 300ml from your bottle.

After four hours is up (no cheating!), remove yourself from your chair and go about your daily life.

Over the next 48 hours, limit your fluid to what’s in the bottle (remember, if you eat fluid-heavy food, such as pasta or rice, this counts as fluid too), then 48 hours from the time you started your last “dialysis” repeat all the steps above, to round out your 48 hours as a dialysis patient.

I’m issuing this challenge in the hope that somebody out there will take it up and understand a little more about what their loved one might be experiencing. I can’t help you experience the nausea, tiredness, and general relentlessness of a dialysis reigieme, but hopefully you will experience a brief glimpse into what is a way of life for those of us unfortunate to be in this situation.

PS: I don’t really expect you to do this, actually, I’d prefer you didn’t, as I’ll probably get my ass sued off if something goes wrong - it’s just meant to give you an idea of what it’s all about